I’ve heard people say, “Why should I forgive him. What he did was wrong!”
Forgiving a person doesn’t condone his actions, nor does it benefit him in any way. The reason you forgive others is to benefit yourself.
Before you forgive someone, you carry around the anger about what he did to you. You have to remember it each time his name is mentioned and you have to bring it to the surface to show your resentment. Frequently, the offender isn’t bothered by his actions at all, leaving only you to suffer from them.
But you don’t have to suffer. You can make the choice to forgive. Your anger towards the wrongdoer doesn’t make your feelings any more valid, nor does it make what he did any more wrong, but it does diminish you’re enjoyment of life.
After you’ve truly forgiven someone, all the anger and resentment towards that person will go away. You’ll still remember the incident, but you’ll no longer be emotional about it. Forgiving allows you to look back on an event without the influence of emotion. It enables you to see the episode clearly and to learn from it.
Too many times our memories of an incident are clouded by the emotions attached to it. This prevents us from learning from it because we can’t see past the emotions to view the actual event. Forgiving allows you to peel off those emotions so you can: A) learn from the past and B) lead a happier, more positive life. Without having to remember that you have all those negative feelings towards someone, your life will become much more pleasurable. These are benefits you get from forgiving. The offender gets nothing.
God taught us to forgive to benefit us, not the wrongdoer. Our God loves us and wants what’s best for us. Forgiveness is one of His best teachings!
